A woman is expected to do it all. Succeed professionally, adhere to societal beauty standards and start a family, all while maintaining a smile on her face.

If a woman is career-oriented, she will often be labeled as bossy or controlling. If a man is focused on his career, he is considered to be ambitious and determined. If a woman gets married young, becomes a mother and a homemaker, she will never have success of her own. If a young man is married and starts a family, he is simply traditional.

Nevermind successful women like Dolly Parton, who facilitated her rise to fame by capitalizing on her own distinct personality and style– all without starting a family of her own. This is a prime example that women’s success cannot be assessed linearly by whether or not they adhere to tradition (and it’s none of anyone’s business, anyway).

These double standards make it impossible for women to satisfy societal pressures. People often mistake feminism for being a misandrist mindset that only encourages women to break free from traditional norms.

In reality, feminism offers choice. It is the idea that a woman can be ambitious and driven while also being nurturing. Women can choose to become mothers or caretakers and still be successful in their own right.

The most pressing issue is not the choice women make; it is the scrutiny they face, no matter the path they take. Women are often penalized for the same qualities that would be coveted in men.

Discrepancies in the treatment between men and women for things that should have no basis in gender have persisted, even while progress toward equality has been made.

Even now, women only earn 85% of what men make on average. While this 15-cent gap has decreased significantly from a whopping 35-cent gap 40 years ago, the gender gap persists.

It is true that legislation like Title IX, which was introduced in the early 1970s, has been passed to ensure equal opportunity between men and women. However, this and other prohibitions on sex-based discrimination do not address this issue that has been ingrained into our deeply patriarchal society for hundreds, and even thousands, of years. No legal code can undo what can only be done through social change and individual introspection.

Equality under law does not free women from perceptual inequalities. The crux of the issue is not ambition or the choice to follow tradition; it is the judgment that women are faced with, no matter the life they choose to lead. Until women are not held to impossible standards, women will continue to be harmed.