A Canuck on Boxing Day

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Americans call it the day after Christmas. Canadians call it Boxing Day. Neither is a particular catchy moniker, but that is not the point.

Frankly, Americans, I was rather hoping your country would have followed suit with many of the other former British colonies and made this a holiday already. It’s the only thing missing from an otherwise perfect end of November and month of December in the U.S.

Please recall that I gave the U.S. kudos for the way it treats Thanksgiving as the official lead-up to the Christmas season in a column a couple of weeks ago, but once Dec. 25 passes, there’s somewhat of an abrupt feeling that the holiday season is over in this country.

Just like that, it’s gone. And so begins a whole year of waiting for Santa Claus to bring me that pony (preferably one named Juniper or Mr. Bojangles)…again.

Well, Jesus simply wouldn’t have wanted his birthday party to end at midnight ‘cause there ain’t no party like a manger party, especially one hosted by DJ Joseph and his wi$emen.

I want to be making merry beyond Christmas Day, which is why Boxing Day serves as a perfect stop-gap solution to transition back into the rigors of everyday life. Consider Boxing Day the festive version of methadone for the candy cane and gingerbread addicted.

Unlike its name suggests, Boxing Day does not necessarily involve packing away your Christmas trimmings, nor does it involve watching a “Rocky” marathon and experiencing the highs and lows of the Italian Stallion’s fictional career. Unless, of course, you so choose to do these things.

That’s the beauty of Boxing Day: Spend it relaxing with family and friends, eating leftovers, assembling flimsy toys, heading out to the stores to return gifts, such as your Magic Bullet (who doesn’t already own one?) or taking advantage of Boxing Day sales (similar to those that Americans encounter on Black Friday).

However you spend it, Boxing Day makes official a day of rest and relaxation so that you can return to work the next day in a positive frame of mind despite the knowledge that the holidays are winding to a close.

Historically, Boxing Day was meant to be a day for servants, who spent Christmas Day catering to their employers’ whims, to exchange gifts and celebrate. Granted, it’s hard to keep a positive frame of mind when you’re employed as a servant, but you’ve probably realized that life hasn’t panned out the way it was supposed to and any break, even if just for Boxing Day, is welcomed.

And you deserve a break, you hard-working readers.

Happy (insert whatever holiday you celebrate here, even though any chance for political correctness this column had was lost when I blasphemously described a certain manger party), everyone.