Don’t degrade ‘kinky’ behavior

Mellisa+Estebo%2C%C2%A0Contributing+Columnist

Mellisa Estebo, Contributing Columnist

Mellisa Estebo

With the start of a new year and a new semester, it’s fitting to introduce the new Q & A section of “The Pleasure Principle.” In addition to writing “The Pleasure Principle,” I host “Sexually Speaking,” a radio show and podcast weekly on WRFL 88.1 FM. “Sexually Speaking” already has a following, so we’ll be using the show’s contact information to allow “The Pleasure Principle” readers to send in their questions regarding sexuality.

All sexuality questions can be sent in anonymously. Sometimes it can be difficult and even embarrassing to ask your parents or friends questions about sexuality. My hope is that “The Pleasure Principle” will be students’ outlet for honest, factual and non-biased answers to one of the most important aspects of our existence — sexuality.

Now that that’s taken care of, let’s get down to business — the business of kinky behavior. According to the website sexetc.org, kinky is defined as, “Relating to or appealing to more uncommon or atypical types of sexual behaviors.” Examples include the following: spanking, BDSM (Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, Sadism and Masochism), and role-playing (the acting out or performance of a particular role).

While these examples might seem a little out of the ordinary, they are more common than one might think.

One might also consider kinky as pertaining more to men than women. Perhaps this is because when a woman wears her partner’s underwear, it’s seen as sexy, but if a man wears a woman’s underwear, it’s seen as kinky. Also, if a woman undresses in front of an open window, it’s seen as erotic, whereas if a man does it, it’s seen as perverted. Whatever the stereotype, one thing remains unchanged­­­­ — both men and women have kinks.

Readers should be mindful of necessary precautions when engaging in BDSM kinks. A safe word is always necessary. Using a word that you might not associate with sexual activity is recommended, such as “yellow” or “pineapple.”

Scissors are a must in case knots, ropes, scarves, etc. are unable to be taken off; and never leave a person unattended for long.

Kinks are not just for the sexually adventurous, and to paraphrase a popular expression regarding kinky behavior, “Don’t yuck someone else’s yum.”

Contact “Sexually Speaking” at: [email protected], www.facebook.com/sxlyspeaking and @sxlyspeaking.

Mellisa Estebo is a psychology sophomore and host of WRFL’s Sexually Speaking.

[email protected]