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UK head coach John Calipari implemented a “tweak” in practice Monday, something he said changed everything about his team before the SEC Tournament.
This mysterious change altered the whole mentality of the team, Calipari said, although he did all he could to sidestep any mention of specifics.
The silence went all the way to the players, who dodged questions about what will be different on Friday.
But let’s make some predictions. Here are four options for Calipari’s magical quick fix:
1. Dog cone collar:
You know those cones that dogs wear when they can’t scratch? Calipari should have gotten one for freshman guard Andrew Harrison. He doesn’t have fleas, but Harrison has a nasty habit of putting his hands on his head in disgust at poor calls or his own poor performance. With this genius canine adaptation, the team morale would improve and all would be fixed.
2. LASIK eye surgery:
The Cats have had some trouble shooting lately. They’ve also had some trouble passing. So, let’s fix it all with this groundbreaking vision repair surgery. With perfect eyesight, the basket will look crystal clear for the remainder of the season. Furthermore, open teammates will appear like they never have before. Offensive perfection is bound to ensue.
3. Gene Hackman strategy:
Hickory (Ind.) High School head coach Norman Dale put an interesting plan into place with his team in the 1986 movie “Hoosiers.” In order to get his team to play together, he wouldn’t allow them to shoot before the players made three passes. This old school approach would create better spacing and unselfish play. But in order to really mimic the Hickory High championship run, the Cats also need some hip-hugging shorts. Nobody wants that.
4. Muzzle for Coach Cal:
Calipari needs to settle down every now and then. A muzzle for UK’s intense and vocal coach would put his players at ease and let them just play. When Calipari was ejected from the Cats’ game at the University of South Carolina, the team surged back from 16 points down to almost win the game. Without Calipari’s relentless badgering, UK made a run. I’m not saying there’s a correlation there, but a little peace and quiet couldn’t hurt.
These are just a few options for the magical late-season fix that Calipari thought of while sitting at his house on Sunday night. It sounds drastic, but I guess we’ll find out on Friday in Atlanta.
In the meantime, remember this list. One of them is bound to carry the Cats all the way to the national championship.