My breath caught as I opened the email.

Like so many others, I had been waiting for months to receive a response to my graduate school application.

I had a lot riding on this letter. Unfortunately, the answer I received was not what I wanted to hear – denied. But what I failed to realize before is that it really doesn’t matter.

For whatever reason, the place I wanted the most didn’t want me back.

Unfortunately, I’m not alone in this fate. This time of the year is tense. Even those not applying to graduate school are waiting to hear back from internships and jobs.

The harsh reality is that not everyone can get into every program. According to Petersons.com, which is a college search engine, most schools have about a 25 percent acceptance rate.

When talking to other people who had plans of going to graduate school, I found a pretty typical disparity. Those who were accepted treat it as if it was no problem, while those who were denied typically shrug and look off to the side.

After receiving my denial I realized I wasn’t experiencing the typical reaction, but a typical case of moving past grief. At first, I told no one. I thought it was a horrible dream, one from which I would wake up in a few minutes.

Then, I got mad. How could they turn me down? Don’t they realize? I am the best student ever! I began to bargain, “what if I sent the decision committee cookies?” Then I got depressed. I locked myself in my apartment with a new episode of “True Detective” and ate the plate of cookies.

In the few days since, I’ve found that I’m beginning to accept my fate. I realized that I’m not the only student who has been denied.

I began to be proactive about my fate. Rather than wallowing, I resolved to email the department.

This is something that anyone can do if they’ve been denied, be it graduate school or a job.

The email included a short description of my future plans as well as how I can improve my skill set.

Besides, what do I have to lose? They can’t deny me twice, can they?

But the most important thing I’ve done is realized that when one door closes, another one opens.

Even though one school said no, another said yes. I have a back up plan, one I’m learning to love.

I’m not the only kid who has been rejected and I won’t be the last.

It’s too bad that we aren’t more open about these losses. In not talking about our rejections we lose the opportunity to commiserate together.

Being able to talk about the denial has helped me move past it. If I had kept it private I would still be brooding and sulking, but instead I’m making bigger and better plans. Now that I’ve been through the worst, I can begin to plan for the best.